As Souls, one of the archetypes we love to play in is the Victim. Everyday we read about people who have been victimized by others.
When we take the Soul-View that we may actually have chosen to be victims (you'll have to ready Journey of Souls to really get this), we can find peace with our victimhood and eventually even find empowerment in it.
But harder than owning our victimhood is to own that we have also been the villain. To put it in the Soul View, we have all been thiefs, rapists, murderers in past lives.
And we may also have done some victimizing of others even in this lifetime. Owning all of this is often called embracing our shadow.
I learned this early in my first marriage. I did not have good relationship tools at the time and had poor examples from my own family growing up.
I remember making agreements with my wife which I didn't keep. When she would call me on it, instead of owning up to my failure...
This part 2 about the "Perfect" problem--what do we do about that voice in our head that constantly nags us about not being good enough, worthy enough--in short--not being perfect.
One answer is to go to the source of the 'problem'--all the way back to the belief that such a thing as perfect even exists.
To do this, let's talk about the Six basic human needs according to Tony Robbins.
One way we can look at ourselves as human beings is that we have certain 'attributes'. Attributes are things like adventurous, timid, outgoing, shy, friendly, loud, persistent, giving, forceful, etc.
All human beings are a collection of different attributes. I may be adventurous, loud, forceful, persistent. You may be soft-spoken, thoughtful, supportive, impatient.
All attributes have their opposite. If I am adventurous, I'm not timid. If I am forceful, I'm not quiet. Graphically, I can illustrate this by putting human attributes on a 'yardstick' with an...
Hi, Mark here. Lynetta and I have a list of words we've 'banned' from our vocabulary because we find them disempowering.
Over the next several emails, we're going to share them with you.
#1 on our list--the word "Perfect"
Why is Perfect a problem? Perfection should be all dreamy and well, perfect, right?
Consider the following:
One of our biggest roadblocks to being completely at peace with ourselves is that deep down, we may think there is something wrong with us.
This comes often from dysfunctional families that so many of us grew up in. If there was discord or worse, abuse, we may believe deep down that we may have been at fault.
We may end up believing we are not good enough, lovable enough, acceptable enough.
And we may end up with a list of 'shoulds'--way should be this way or that--more of this, less of that.
We should be more loving, giving, kind, understanding, patient, accepting. We should be less judgmental, critical, loud,...
Mark again. One more technique for dealing with someone else's emotional blowups.
By-the-way, I'm assuming here that we are NOT talking about a situation where there is any possibility of real physical danger. If there is, take proper care of your safety.
This technique goes back to the Soul View of people and who we are and why we are here. If you haven't studied these questions yet, take a look at The Foundation Teachings or get Journey of Souls and Destiny of Souls from Dr. Michael Newton.
To summarize the Soul View briefly, we all have our Soul Objectives for being in this world. We want to have certain experiences. We may actually want to experience challenging relationships.
To accomplish these Soul Goals, as Souls before we incarnate, we enlist each other to be 'actors' in each other's life play.
This may include treating each other in life in less than the highest ways.
Mark again. More to share about dealing with other people's emotional issues.
It's great to get that someone else's blowup is all about them and some old trauma they are re-experiencing and has nothing to do with you.
Even if they are blaming you for whatever they are upset about, you are still just a 'stand-in' for whoever caused the original upset.
Now, knowing this is great BUT there's still the emotional 'blowback' to deal with.
One technique you may want to try on for these situations is the blast-fence technique.
Blast Fences which are also known as Jet blast Deflectors are commonly found at airports where a public road exists right at the beginning of an aircraft runway. You may have seen them at San Jose airport in California or LaGuardia in New York.
When a jet plane is starting its takeoff, it directs powerful jet exhaust directly to its rear. If there happen to be cars or people on the road right behind it, they can literally get...
Lynetta and I are staying with my mom in LA and she has her challenges.
She gets frazzled when things don't go her way. A minor fender bender, mahjong getting cancelled...
And she voices her irritation.
That by itself is not a problem.
However, I got irritated. Now that IS a problem.
By now I know if I get irritated, it's because there's a story running behind the scenes about what's going on.
My story goes back to childhood and goes like this: "If someone is upset, it could be dangerous for me". This was mostly about my dad who had a violent temper. But if my mom said something about me to him...
So I have this old 'fear story' that when someone else is irritated, it may be dangerous for me.
So what to do when this comes up? For me, it's back to my Avatar training:
Step 1: Remember it's not about you.
When someone is emoting, it's never really about you. It's almost always triggering from our childhoods that hasn't been...
The first 3 steps of Affirmative Prayer we covered so far are Acknowledging your Desire, Acknowledging your Creator and Feeling Oneness with Creator.
Once you have that Oneness with Creator and are connected with the powers that Creator has, you are now ready for:
Step 4 -- Completion. Completion is when our desired outcome is a felt reality right now. You feel it even before it appears in your physical reality. Current 'reality' is irrelevant here. You feel your desire as-if it were already accomplished.
Step 5 is Gratitude. Feel Gratitude for your completed desired outcome. Again, feel the gratitude for what you desire as-if it has already manifested.
Step 6 is to Celebrate. Let the good times roll! Take off your shoes, put on your favorite jams and shake your booty! You have done what not many people are willing to do--you followed through!
You started out with a desire that is close to...
Lynetta again with Affirmative Prayer - Part 2.
My Sweetie Mark and I made some changes to the Affirmative Prayer Steps, there used to be 5 steps but now there are 6. We realized that before you can have real affirmative prayer, you have to acknowledge your desires. So we added this as the first step.
We have a video we have crafted for you to take you through the 6 Steps of Affirmative Prayer.
Here are the 6 steps:
1. Acknowledge your Desire
2. Acknowledge your Creator
3. Feel Oneness with Creator
4. Feel it's Completion
How do you know what your deepest desires are, when you have been burying them so deep in your ocean of concealment it would take a professional deep sea diver to find them?
We get many calls from people who have buried their true desires so deeply they don't even have access to their dreams anymore. We have learned to ask questions that take you deep into your consciousness to discover what...
After spending over 25 years in strict religion, prayer meant pleading with an easily angered, judging God to grant us some crumbs of something we wanted even though we weren't 'worthy'.
It wasn't performed out of love but rather necessity. It emphasized our powerlessness to control our own lives since 'God' was in control.
When I left my religion and embarked on my spiritual quest, prayer was a casualty. I left it behind as too dis-empowering.
When I got involved with Center for Spiritual Living, they taught me a completely different type of prayer. This one was exciting, joyous, empowering.
Earnest Holmes gave us a simple 5 step Affirmative Prayer Treatment:
Step 1 ) Recognition of Source
Step 2 ) Unification (I AM)
Step 3 ) Realization (feeling it has been accomplished right now)
Step 4 ) Gratitude
Step 5 ) Release (let it go)
In Part 2 of Affirmative Prayer, I will show an example of how I say my...
Hi, Lynetta here.
All my life, I've had deep questions no one could answer. The biggest question that repeated over and over in my head was "Who am I?"
I could not find a good answer in the religion of my family of origin. I looked in the scriptures, reading Genesis to Revelations. There was nothing about "Who I am".
I searched other religions; they too had no answers for me.
I asked the Native Indians. They brought me to Nature. Even though it was not a direct answer to my life question, it did plant a seed that I am part of something bigger--I am connected to Nature. I could feel that connection. I was getting closer.
For a time, I tried drugs and sex to escape the question. Yet still I held the question in my heart.
I scrambled through books, teachings, religions, philosophies, the metaphysical, self-improvement, Center for Spiritual Living, Self- Realization Centers, Yoga, Meditation and into an Ex-JW Empowerment Group....
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