Lynetta and I are staying with my mom in LA and she has her challenges.
She gets frazzled when things don't go her way. A minor fender bender, mahjong getting cancelled...
And she voices her irritation.
That by itself is not a problem.
However, I got irritated. Now that IS a problem.
By now I know if I get irritated, it's because there's a story running behind the scenes about what's going on.
My story goes back to childhood and goes like this: "If someone is upset, it could be dangerous for me". This was mostly about my dad who had a violent temper. But if my mom said something about me to him...
So I have this old 'fear story' that when someone else is irritated, it may be dangerous for me.
So what to do when this comes up? For me, it's back to my Avatar training:
Step 1: Remember it's not about you.
When someone is emoting, it's never really about you. It's almost always triggering from our childhoods that hasn't been resolved. We are all 'stand-ins' in someone else's reenactments of their childhood dramas.
So saying to myself "This isn't really about me at all" is the first step. Sometimes, that alone is sufficient to completely diffuse the energy.
If not, I move on to step 2:
Step 2: Make the 'problem' energetically bigger.
I know this one is totally counter-intuitive. But instead of trying to minimize the annoyance I feel, I actually try to internally make the annoyance or whatever emotion it is as big as possible.
You don't have to do this out loud but if you're in private, it can be an awful lot of fun to exaggerate its significance to the point of silliness.
This almost always releases the energy.
Try it! These 2 steps can quickly clear most emotional confrontations.
But, if it doesn't work, there's always a Emotional Clearing Mini-Session.
Try one! They are fast, easy, inexpensive and very effective.
To your freedom, my friends!
Mark and Lynetta
P.S. There's just no reason to live with emotional pain nowadays. The tools for clearing it are just so good. Try them out! Emotional Clearing Mini-Session
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