Authentic Lovemaking
Oct 15, 2019
Is your lovemaking authentic?
- Are you revealing all of YOU?
- Do you feel deeply passionate and juicy?
- Are you holding some of you back? Do you know what?
This topic of authentic lovemaking came up when I realized I was not that interested in lovemaking anymore.
I discovered two things running in my subconscious that were getting in the way of authentic lovemaking.
The first was I still felt crushed by Don Juan, my former, Latin lover. I was still grieving the loss of that passionate relationship, where ultimately, I felt betrayed by passion.
According to Ramtha, we don’t have a life purpose for being here. We are all Creators. We choose our life according to whatever we desire. Nothing that we desire is ever “wrong, bad, a mistake or failure”. There will be no regrets at the end of our lifetime unless we choose to be in regret.
I am a great experimenter in life. I try on many different lifestyles, beliefs, cultures, ideas and persona’s, just for the pure joy of experiencing differences. The Reality that Ramtha is painting is how I live my life.
I have no life purpose other than whatever I choose to live. I love the ecstasy of intimacy with another Soul. Mark has dreamed of this level of intimacy since we first met.
I asked myself, what would it be like to reveal more of myself than I have ever done before?
So I decided to give Mark a road map to my ecstasy. Guarding my ecstasy was a need to know, that when I revealed all of me, he would still fully love me and embrace all of me.
I needed to know that, no matter what, I always have a home in his heart.
What I heard next shocked me.
A voice in my head said: ”You are pathetic!”
Every time a relationship came to an end, that voice criticized me.
Being pathetic was everywhere.
To not be pathetic, I learned to put on a mask and became a master at performance.
When I shared with Mark that I have been running the ”pathetic program” my whole life, he reassured me that he has always seen me as the opposite of pathetic. He sees me as the most powerful woman he has ever known, because of what I have gone through and conquered.
He knows the challenging childhood I came from and considers it a miracle I blossomed into the amazing woman that I am today.
I realize where my “pathetic story” originated.
When I was a child, I wanted love from parents that were not capable of giving it to me. In particular, I wanted quality time with them. Quality time is one of my primary love languages. I yearned for more quality time with Mom and Dad. That followed me into every relationship. When I did not get it, I blamed myself for being “pathetic”.
Pathetic was a negative name I called myself, because of my longing to be loved in my primary love language. I never received it from my partners because they also were not capable of giving it. My intense yearning to be loved, dug down deep into my heart like a tick. The ache within my heart yearned for relief. So my mind stepped in to rationalize it away: You know, Lynetta, if you were not so pathetic, none of this would have happened!
To heal this, I wrote the following letter of acknowledgement to myself:
Dearest Lynetta,
Everyone wants to be loved. It is a human need. We cannot live without Love. Love is everything. You were never pathetic for wanting what is natural and essential to life.
I love YOU! And you have a husband who totally loves you. He wants you to feel completely loved in all your love languages. And if you share all of this with him, he will honor all of your desires and fulfill them.
Here is an exercise for your own self-discovery:
Ask yourself these questions:
- Do I feel safe?
- Do I speak authentically in my relationship?
- Do I choose partners who want all of me?
- Do I know what my love language is?
- Do I need to hear words that reassure me?
- Do I need to be held close, in silence?
- Do I need gifts?
- Do I need him to do things for me?
- Do I need more quality time?
- What is my map to ecstasy?
There may be even more that you require to feel completely loved and treasured.
Write a letter to yourself, acknowledging the challenges of your childhood.
- What voices do you hear in the background?
- What is keeping you from being your authentic self? Are you being your own best friend?
- Are you emotionally unavailable?
- What would happen if you let down your guard?
- What is possible if you are authentic?
Give yourself time to sink into these questions. Questions can be gateways to deeper authentic inquiry.
You can check out more blogs at MarkandLynetta.com/blog,
Sent with Blessings,
Lynetta Avery
Soul Wizard
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